Murderdolls: The Legend of 'Crazy Stone'
by Shadow ScytheX
Summary: Crazy Stone... Sinner, or Saint? Man, or myth? Evil, or REALLY Evil? You decide.


Murderdolls: The Legend of 'Crazy Stone'

By Shadow ScytheX

Author's Note: This is dedicated to ChiSakki, who inspired the fic.

Stone then looked back at his caravan. "Arie, is your bass in tune?"

"For the last time, yes, it is. Are we going to go through with this or not?"

Stone's eyes gleamed. "Yes. Now, Sean, when I start to play, please, please, PLEASE make sure you don't forget to play the bongos again. That almost caused a disaster last time." And with that, the caravan was on the move again; off to save another group of poor abused canon refugees, like yesterday.

Silver Fang sighed, brushing the fur of her tail. "I wish I wasn't so damn shallow and had some character depth..." She then bit her lip, and passed out.

A few minutes later, she awoke. "I really have to stop doing that." Aragorn then came in through the back door.

"Fang, r u alright?"

"Yes, dear. Just another lip incident."

"we gut to get j00 fyled!!1!11!" Aragorn then sighed. He no longer recognized his own voice or actions. 'And I used to be such a clever guy... I wonder what Eowyn's doing...'

In the other room, Boromir was scowling. "I feel brooding and evil, but why?" He drummed his fingers on the table, then leaned over to sniff a flower that Silver Fangs had found. When his nose touched it, the flower died. "Ah... This has happened all too often as of late."

A loud crack of wood suddenly interrupted Boromir's brooding and Aragorn's self-loathing. Fangs, being the omnipotent wolf she was, went to look and see what happened. "Archie, come here! A wagon's broken down in front of our house!"

Stone then grimaced. 'Archie? Does this mean... No! She got Aragorn!' He then stepped out of the 'broken' caravan, and walked up to the not-so-humble cottage. "Hello, madam, we seem to have broken down in front of your house. May we stay for the night while we fix our caravan?" He then gave her a dashing smile. "We can put on a performance for you..."

Arie then tumbled out of the wagon. '...Jackpot!' Sean then grinned and took out the bongos, while Arie took out her acoustical bass. Aragorn had come out to see the ruckus, and noticed Sean walking up to him.

"Tell her that you need to leave for a day to see Elrond. I'm here to help."

"wut u tlakin abut?"

"Aragorn, come back to normal. Eowyn misses you, man." Aragorn's glazed eyes suddenly returned to their normal state. "You need to pull it together. No amount of wolf love is going to fill that gap. Remember unrequited love?"

Aragorn then stood straight up, recovering from his prior stupor. "...What the hell have I been doing?" Aragorn then shook his head. "God... What in Mordor am I doing here?"

"You've been affected by a Mary Sue. I'm going to open up your mind. What you may see may shock you, scare you, and possibly mentally scar you." Sean then closed his eyes, and slapped Aragorn in the face.

"Son of an orc, why did you-"Aragorn then paused. His face went into a mixture of shock, horror, and downright revulsion. "I just... I did... Oh my lord... Fangs, I need to see Elrond! I'll be back in a day!"

Boromir then nearly jumped out of the cottage. "I'll go with him! So he's... Um... Safe. You can never be too careful."

Fang stared enchanted with Stone. "Yes... Go on."

Later on, Stone stood inside of the cottage, with a fireplace burning behind him, which struck him as odd, but it was Sue logic. He had his guitar on his shoulder, and he began to play. "Girl..." He plucked at it three times. "You're not yet a woman..." Fangs stared up at him, completely enchanted. "Let's run off to the mountains."

And so, in the middle of the night, playing guitar all the while, Stone led Fangs to the mountains, into a dark cave. "Nobody can hear you scream in the mountains..." he said darkly.

All of a sudden, a set of bongos drummed on, echoing through the cave. Fangs then suddenly snapped out of it, tossing his guitar to Arie, who set it in the caravan, which mysteriously appeared just outside the cave. Sean looked up from the bongos, not stopping, and flashed a grin at Fangs. "It's over, girly."

"I'll kill all of you faster than you can blink!" She then started to charge up a lightning bolt, which suddenly shorted out. "What the hell!?"

"Sean, nice work on the bongos. She can't use her petty magic on us..." Arie grinned, taking out an axe. Stone then smiled. "I never told you why they call me 'Crazy' Stone, did I?" He then took out a long knife. "Ooh, this looks to be a bit messy..."

A few minutes later, Stone walked out, coated in blood, while Arie and Sean walked out perfectly clean. "You HAD to cut the artery closest to me, didn't you Arie?"

"Bah, think of the good we've done for Middle-Earth. Besides, we're the Murderdolls! We have to get messy SOMETIME."

-End

Ah... Sue destruction. Makes me feel good.


End file.
